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Mobsters Of the Midway Ledger- 071021

By CoachDumphool321
7/10/2021 9:19 pm
Interview with CoachDumphool (excerpts)
Motml Reporter: So, Coach, you're back! Bet Chicago is glad have you as GM again.

CDP: Huh? Oh yeah. Maybe they are. Who knows. Wish I could say the same.

Motml Reporter: What, Coach? You're not happy here?

CDP: Of course I am. Absolutely.

Motml Reporter: So what made you decide to come back?

CDP: The excitement, the glory, the fans. Chicago itself. I just couldn't stay away. :P

Motml Reporter: Really? You just love Chicago?

CDP: Look, that was a load of crap for the fans and the press. It was the money of course.

Motml Reporter: How can that be? Surely, that's not true...

CDP: I'll tell you what's true. Two weeks ago I was lying on a beach in Tahiti enjoying the good life. Thought I was never gonna have to lift a finger ever again. My accountant calls me out of the blue and tells me I'm broke. I swear I thought I had millions stashed away. So here I am. I swear that little creep skipped town with my money! If I ever get my hands on him...

Motml Reporter: So how's the team look this year? Chicago is going to have a winning season?!?

CDP: Who knows. The defense is alright. Not spectacular but OK. The main problem is with the offense. I can't see where we're going to get points from...

Motml Reporter: Why is that, Coach? What is the problem?

CDP: Can't you see with your eyes? There's no speed on this whole team. You need some speed to sneak into the end zone. I assume you are aware that there's 11 big, mean, ugly, angry guys on the other side of the line trying to stop that. Outside of an invisibility cloak, every extra ounce of speed can help with that goal.

Motml Reporter: So you have a plan to score more points?

CDP: Plan? We've searched every warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse, and doghouse for some speed. It might have helped had this team picked somebody up in free agency or the draft. But look what they brought in. A couple of steamrollers and a cement mixer.

Motml Reporter: So what are you going to do, Coach?

CDP: Do? Do? What are we going to do? We're going to smash a few people in the mouth, that's what we're going to do!

Motml Reporter: Sounds harsh.

CDP: It's the Chicago way.

Motml Reporter: So there's something I've always wanted to ask you about. I hope you don't mind...

CDP: Go ahead. Quit stalling.

Motml Reporter: Well, it's...

CDP: Yes?

Motml Reporter: Well, some of the guys on the team. You know what I mean.

CDP. No, actually. I don't.

Motml Reporter: Well the, uh, you know, uh ... uh ...uh (whispering) the, uh mob guys on the team?

CDP: What the hell are you talking about? Out with it.

Motml Reporter: Well, like uh, Capone.

CDP: Capone? Al Capone? Great guy. He's no mob guy.

Motml Reporter: Well, what about Frank Nitti? And Louis Campagna? Paul Castellano? Tommy Lucchesi? Frank Costello? Vito Genovese? Aren't they all gangsters and murderers?

CDP: You think we have all gangsters and murderers in Chicago? Sure we an Alphonse Capone on the team. You think he'sthe Alphonse Capone? That's funny.

Motml Reporter: Sorry, Coach. My apologies to you and the team.

CDP: No. Not criminals. Just tough guys, that's all. Chicago is famous for its tough guys. That's what Chicago is all about.

Motml Reporter: Thanks for the interview. Good luck this season.

CDP: We're gonna need it. Thanks.
Last edited at 7/10/2021 9:39 pm